His mates watch, and giggle, when tracer bullets from Spongebob’s machine gun rip through a Taleban fighter. A wounded colonel high on morphine mistakes a helicopter for a train. Young men and teenagers fight the toughest battles for fifty years. Then play like puppies in the sand of their isolated bases, cooling off in paddling pools. Almost no one out there understands why Britain is at war in Helmand. They would not have missed it. Sam Kiley joined 16 Air Assault Brigade and got unescorted and unrestricted access to the front line for a full six month tour of duty. .